Lately I feel like i hear so much from my mommy friends that they feel they should be doing something more important. Most of the time I don’t actually talk about my business outside of my family and close friends because it so often ends with someone telling me that they should be doing something like that too, instead of “just looking after their kids”. The number of times I’ve heard another woman talk herself down after that, and belittle the very important work she does – well, it just breaks my heart. Losing self worth is a tragedy, and it’s something I know I’ve fought against a lot.
I think it’s common for moms to sometimes feel a little unimportant. Especially when you’re home full time, home alone with your kids all day, it can feel like no-one appreciates or understands how hard the job is, how much work is involved. And often my little ones themselves, seem to be the ones who appreciate me the least.
There have been times I’ve felt like the world looks down on my choice to stay home. I feel I immediately lose respect when I tell someone I stay home with my kids. I feel pressure to define myself in a way other than “just being a mom”. I know it isn’t fair, and it isn’t right, but I guess that’s just the world we live in.
But I learnt a valuable lesson when I came home from Texas.
As I started walking up the path to our front door, Chris opened it and Bunny and Buddy literally threw themselves at me. I was standing in our doorway bowled over with them both on top of me clinging their little arms around my neck. This trip was the first time I’d ever been away since they were born. Bunny kept telling me how much she loved me and that she was sad without me, and Buddy (who hardly ever deigns to kiss anyone) planted four kisses on me in about 2 seconds. For the rest of the night they followed me around like little puppies, watching everything i did, and just wanting to be near me.
And in that moment, I remembered how important I was. As much as I love my business, and I love how much it has grown, and no matter how excited I get about where it’s going, and about the future – it’s important to remember it doesn’t define me. They do. These two little bundles of joy who changed my life forever make me more important than anything ever can.
They are my Magnum Opus.